Solitude

The slight ticking of the clock tells me it's one o’clock in the night. Only sound I can hear is that of the ticking clock and my own breathing which seems out of place. I frown and wish I could stop breathing so as to enjoy the absolute silence.

The silence is comforting and it only feels safe in the dark. I feel safe in the dark. Darkness is like a huge comforting blanket that engulfs all the troubles, pain, misery, death- everything. It’s not that suddenly in the dark these things cease to exist. It’s just that I can’t see them in the absence of light and when I don’t see them I don’t think of them. Everything becomes a blur, like a distant bad dream, very far from reality. I'm certain I'm not alone who finds the darkness soothing and comforting.

I just want to pull this darkness over me like a cosy blanket of safety, close to myself and go off to sleep. I don’t want to face the world, it's ugly. I don’t want to see the light, it's blinding. I don’t want to be able to see things as they are, they are appalling. Yes, reality is appalling and I am disgusted.

I don’t want anyone looking for me, calling out my name. People are pathetic, every single one of them. I don’t want them disturbing the silence, waking me up from my dream. There is just one person I want to be with- myself.
Solitude is the most faithful companion and the best company. Indeed.