Monday, December 31, 2012

Why am I Making Such Fuss over Crime Against Women, you ask?

Because I'm a woman and I'm terrified of going out after dark; because my mom calls me every 10 minutes if I'm not back home after 6 pm; because Delhi is my city too and I'm sick of living in fear, sick of constantly looking over my shoulder, sick of being whistled at, stared at, groped, molested and harassed every time I venture out. Because I'm a woman and not a bird who should be back in her nest after dark; Because I believe Delhi Police's ingenious idea of putting us women under house arrest after 8 pm in the name of our own safety isn't so ingenious after all, but instead reeks of laziness and apathy.

Because before being a woman, I'm a human.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

An apologetic goodbye- RIP GIRL. I am sorry (Delhi Rape Case)

Dear Friend (Medical Student),

I know it's a bit too late and may be too little for what you've gone through, but I want to start by aplologising to you on the behalf of a society that needed an 'educated girl like you to be brutally mutilated on a public transport on a route that they themselves have taken at least once in their lifetime' to awaken, because this time it was too close to home for them; on the behalf of the inept, inert, apathetic Police force that sincerely believes that women themselves are responsible for getting raped- after all real victims never report and that couldn't protect your basic right to live; the corrupt, torpid & dormant government that wakes up occasionally to issue statements after every crime, and promptly goes back to sleep.

I apologise to you on the behalf of every Indian who takes pride in his/her country and defends the misogynistic traditions and hypocritical patriarchal culture it stands for; on the behalf of a sad nation that will call you on the 8th day of Navratras and respectfully wash your feet while being glad that you weren't born in their family; on the behalf of every mother and father who claims that they treat their children equally and give them equal opportunities by sending them to school, while asking their daughters to be back home before 'sun-set', on the behalf of all those men, women and politicians who feel one accident should turn a woman into a 'Zinda laash'; on the behalf of the entire media that made your whole life look meaningless in comparison that one incident and went on to nickname you 'Damini'. I'm sorry, that we Indians are like that- we just love our butter chicken and Bollywood, and I'm sorry that you went out with just any male friend and not with Sunny Deol by your side, but being a Delhite you should have known better that you'll need to be protected, that you'll need a real man by your side to fight for you.

I apologise to you on the behalf of all the people who felt sorry for you, angry even, but who instead of actually getting up and doing something about it updated their facebook or twitter status and instantly felt better. I apologise on the behalf of each and every person who readily passes the buck and blames the politicians, the miserable system or even the police instead of admitting that they themselves at some level or the other were part of the problem; on behalf of everyone who will tell you to rest in peace while those rascals breathe easy and your family runs from pillar to post for justice.

Please also accept my apologies on the behalf of everyone who is demanding death penalty, life imprisonment or even castration for those bastards- I wish I could ensure a more medieval punishment- stuffing the same rod in every possible hole in the bodies of those men several times a day, everyday, till they are dead.

I know you must be hopeful, but let me apologise to you in advance for all the disappointments that are about to come your way when the government fails to do something, anything; when the flurry around you dies down and people get back to their routines; when you're forced to fade into oblivion by celebrity marriages or even cricket matches, and become a date in archives of old news papers until other mutilated rape victim takes your place.

Last but not the least I want to apologise to you of my own actions and inaction- every time that I gave into my mom's demands of being back home before dark, every time I didn't give hell to those sexual harassers on the public transport because I was tired to my bones or wanted to get home early, everytime I saw a woman being harassed and let myself be pulled to safety by my friends instead of doing something about it. I have slapped, beaten and dragged men to police vans for sexual harassment, even broken their cell phones for taking pictures of unsuspecting women but I apologise for just stopping there and even feeling good about myself. I apologise for not following up at the police station because I got busy or just lazy.

I apologise sincerely and from the bottom of my heart. 
With a hand on my heart, I bid you Goodbye my friend. 
I can only hope you're in a better place now.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Epiphany (I)

Often, friends and family have told me how they are almost certain of seeing me in some news paper someday. Flattering as it might seem, their remark more often than not leaves me perturbed and secretly praying that it's not on the third page of some news paper under the obituary column.

I'm not sure if it's the youthful idealism, arrogance or my ego but I do desperately want my life to mean something.

Additional NOTE:
Dear D,
Even though Paulo Cohelo told you otherwise, you can't just want something badly enough and then leave it up to the conspiring universe to do the needful. Believing that this or any other parallel universe will conspire in your favour just by virtue of wanting something isn't just stupid, it's beyond stupid.

It's about time you stop being stupid, got off your lazy ass and started doing things. Also, start USING ME for a change, I'm one of those wonderful things that the more you use, the more I grow.

With Love,
D's Brain

Thursday, February 16, 2012

You know you're with the right guy when..

..even after being with you for 4 years

  • the thought of being with you for another forty still fills him with a sense of wonder
  • he remembers the stuffed white tiger you liked in the mall and surprises you with it and a little tiger cub at your work.
  • he drives through traffic to your work just because you have a sudden whim to have lunch with him
  • he wrote a special song, just to put you to sleep
  • he holds you by the waist and sings softy in your ear till you completely forget what was bothering you
  • he drives around entire city to find you momos exactly like the ones you loved in back home
  • he tells a store manager to keep an eye out for a particular blue dress you had been obsessing over and randomly picks you from work to get you the dress as soon as it arrives
  • he celebrates your ‘Birthday Eve’, ‘Birthday’ and throws in another ‘Birthday++’ because you don’t want the celebration to end yet. 3 days of birthday celebration because he knows how much you love your birthdays
  • he gets you lunch because you are too lazy, too hungry or too caught up to get some yourself
  • he knows that you’re sharing your last piece of chocolate cake with him only and only because you’re full and still loves you
  • he sings you to sleep
  • he tells you dragon stories(if you still love dragons that is) to keep your mind off the pain during your periods
  • he quits smoking because the smoke makes you nauseous
  • he flies down from another city over the weekend because you really miss him
  • he randomly gets you roses
  • he sees the world as - things you love or would love and things you dislike and hate
  • he is willing to let you drive his car even though the last time was a disaster
  • instead of ignoring you or waiting for you to tell him, he still gets bothered if you are even slightly angry, upset or even irritated
  • he stops the car and runs across the highway to get you some wild dried plant that you thought looked fascinating
  • he takes out time every once in a while to tell you that you are the best thing that happened to him
P.S: Still confused? Well let's just say if you're with the right guy, you'll already have a list of your own. ;)

The Right Guy? 


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